Absolutely

On the beginning of believing I didn’t have to earn being chosen.

Generated by AI

Yeah handsome? You think I’m your type so far?

I smile at that message bubble and quickly type back.

So far 😂 you think I’m yours?

And go to slide my phone back in my pocket. But the typing bubble instantly appears, so I pause.

Absolutely

I blink.

That was such a definitive answer.

I was partially kidding, so I didn’t expect him to actually answer it.

Especially not so confidently.

I mean, I’m also pretty sure at this point, but typically I’m the one who feels too much, too soon.

The response time for that was so fast.

Like he didn’t have to think about it.

I stare at the message for a few seconds, my thumbs hovering over the keyboard as my brain practically short circuits.

What do I say to that?

You could just be honest. That’s a thought.

I roll my eyes.

When has honesty in this context ever done me any favors?

But as I stand staring at my phone, I can’t think of anything else to say. Do I tell him that was definitive? How would he take that?

Well, looks like that’ll have to be it since, apparently, I can’t come up with anything else.

That was a definitive answer

Another thought bubble.

lol should I have played it more cool and nonchalant?

I smile again. Okay, sir, very coy. I can appreciate that.

The conversation continues after that once I tell him that’s not what I meant, but this lingering warmth sits in my chest.

It’s different from just mushy beginning-of-dating butterflies, though.

As I head back onto the floor, I realize it’s the beginning of reconsidering a belief about myself.

That maybe I’m worth someone’s attention after all.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve thought I had to earn my place in people’s lives. That if they chose to stay, it was because I’d convinced them I was useful in some way.

And I’ve told people that their worth doesn’t come from others. It’s there because everyone has inherent worth.

Never was quite able to convince myself of that though.

But in this small moment, a little spark ignites in the back of my mind.

There have been several other small moments with him that have contributed to this too, but this is the first time I’ve really stopped and sat with it.

This cheesy grin won’t leave my face for the rest of my shift now, and I re-read the message whenever I’m on break.

Absolutely.

One word. One word that’s touched on years of insecurity.

One word that showed me that maybe I could actually be wanted without a sales pitch.